Aunt Mara

Hello internet. I am Carolyn and Aunt Mara was my- well aunt. I have no idea how to start this blog post but to say that Aunt Mara passed Monday this week on December 4^th. This week I have been re-reading these blog posts as a way to hear her voice even now that she is gone.

Aunt Mara’s faith was extremely important to her and brought her comfort and strength throughout her life but particularly after her diagnosis. This is one of my favorite stories that my grandmother, Geraldine, told about Aunt Mara. One day, when Aunt Mara was very young, they were talking and Geraldine said “I’m so glad you’re here,” and Aunt Mara replied “Well I tried to come before!” To my grandmother that was a wonderful conversation because in between having my Uncle Erik and Aunt Mara she had several miscarriages. She saw this as a sign that everything had finally worked out and Aunt Mara had indeed been born! When I talked about this with Aunt Mara after her diagnosis she started crying. Mara shared that the story was one of the things that kept her going during her journey with ALS. She knew she was meant to be here and even though she was often asking herself “Why am I here?” that story showed her that this was all according to God’s plan even though she might not be in on whatever the plan was!

Other than her faith, music also seemed to be one of the things that grounded Aunt Mara. Dancing was her and Bob’s life and seeing live music was one of their favorite things to do. After her diagnosis they continued to enjoy live music, visiting Rinky Dinks often to enjoy performances by musicians they now considered friends. Monique Meade also visited Aunt Mara to play the Beethoven Violin Concerto at her house as part of her Beethoven in the Face of Adversity project. My grandfather, Mara’s father, was an amazing pianist and organist and played us plenty of Chopin. I imagine growing up in that musical house helped create her love of music.

Many of us know that music can speak where words can’t. I loved that Aunt Mara started adding songs to these last three posts and have also been listening to these wonderful, happy, fun and hopeful songs this week. I’d like to reshare them here and also add a song of my own.

I am adding Sam Bush’s Circles Around Me that I had been meaning to share with Aunt Mara but hadn’t before she passed. I was visiting in October and mentioned that we were going to see Sam Bush perform and she said she hadn’t listened to him before. This song has embodied something for me since I first heard it that I couldn’t quite put my finger on but always moved me. At the performance Sam Bush spoke about this song before he played and said that gratitude is at its root. This made sense to me, the feeling I have had listening has been an extreme awe for the life that I have, for the people I love in it and as the song says “of those that came before and the definite sound of all this love falling down on me.” I would like to send this song out as a message of gratitude for Aunt Mara, such an amazing person who filled our lives with love and will continue to even as she has moved on to those that came before.

Please add in the comments links to recordings of any songs that make you think of Aunt Mara, or simply joyful songs you’d like to share with those remembering Aunt Mara. I cannot think of a better way to celebrate her life than enjoying this playlist.